Sooo Sad

Well Will is now staying with his PawPaw again. We've been talking about it, and today it finalyl happened. We're doing this for us. We know that we shouldn't be living together. We know it'll just make the time we spend together more precious but it still hurts a lot. I can't stop crying. He's gonna stop by in the morning on his way to work, but its not the same. You know I got used to waking up by him in the morning. My bed is so big and lonely without him there. I know I'll get used to it but I just don't want too.

Hopefully for my birthday we're gonna go to Lubbock. I talked to Daniel about it last night. That would be the perfect birthday for me. I wanna see Daniel and Anna so bad. Well thats really all I have to say. Later days...

Elvan Bryce Lockett

My best friend Marcie had her baby on Wednesday August 23, 2005. This is one of the first of many pictures I hope to recieve of my new nephew. He is too cute.

Talkin to old friends

Well I finally got in touch with my good friend Rachel again. I miss my Rae Rae. I haven't talked to her in almost a year. We've been having problems contacting each other. But its all good. I thought I might have made her mad at first cause I couldn't get her to call me back or anything. But I understand she's been really busy. Its sooo good to talk to her. In fact as I am writing this entry we are talking. We've been talking for close to an hour now. Its really nice. Hopefully she can come down next weekend for my baptism. She's gotta work but she's gonna try to get around it. Which is awesome. If she can't next week then she's gonna try and get the next weekend off and that way she can come down and we can spend the whole weekend together. If my car were more dependable I would drive it to San Marcos.

Oh on that note I might be getting a new car. Ricky is purchasing a Plymouth Neon. It just needs a little work. Hopefully he gets it running soon. I'm gonna let him sell my car and what we don't get on it I'll make up the difference. Its a 2000 Plymouth Neon. It looks nice. Very clean.

Well Will and I are closing in on a year. We just passed 10 months on the 18 of this month. October 18 will be a whole year. I really really do love him. I know we fight sometimes but they say if your not willing to fight for a relationship then theres probably not much there.

I am getting baptized next weekend. I am really excited. I know that this is the right direction.

Well classes start tomorrow at PV. Financial Aid still hasn't come through but I've got a couple more weeks for it to make it. Well I'm gonna end this post. Later days...

I'm Getting Baptized

I talked to Brother Mike, Sunday, at Monaville Baptist Church and he is going to Baptize me on September 4th, I think. I am so excited about it. I finally shared the good news with Doc Sunday that I had accepted Christ as my Savior. Everyone is so excited for me. It just proves that I am stepping into a whole new world. I have so many people there to support me. I feel like my life is so full of blesssings.

Will and I are praying together now before we go to sleep at night. I just pray that the Lord will make our relationship stronger and more secure. Theres a lot there. Sometimes its just buried under muck. Things seem really good. I think having this will just bring us closer. When I pray I certainly pray for us.

Marcie and Kristen and I are sharing bible verses every week. Its another way for me to learn more about my Savior and keep in touch with my wonderful friends.

One thing I have been worried about has been financial aid for this semester. I recieved an e-mail yesterday that said that I should be awarded on Friday. Praise God. Glory.

Dear Lord thank you for the blessings you have bestowed upon me, my family, friends, loved ones. It means so much to know that I have you in my life. My only regret is that it took so long to realize it. I guess you have a plan for all of us. You alone are worthy of my praise. I've planned my life around so much other wordly things. I never realized that they couldn't truly make me happy. Just in the past week I have discovered so much more worth living for. Praise God you are worthy. I pray that you take care of Marcie and Shawn and little Bryce as the end of this pregnancy draws near. Thank you for everything you do. In Jesus's name I pray. Amen.

Prairie View A&M

Well I am now enrolled at Prairie View A&M University. Now hopefully, through Gods will and lots of prayer my financial aid will come through in time. If it doesn't well then I will get dropped from my classes and I'll just be working for the rest of the semester.

I am in Spanish, College Alegebra, Sociology of Minorities, History, and Physical Science. Well I'll write more later. Later days...

No Job at Woodforest

Well I guess I'm not gonna get the job at Woodforest. My past credit issues messed that up. I have gotten a few extra hours at Coldstone though. So thats nice. I also applied today at BlackHorse Ranch Golfclub. They said that now was a good time to put in applications. They are going to hire a few new girls soon. So that will be nice. Well thats all I have to say right now. Later days...

Take All Things To The Lord in Prayer

I don't know why this is so hard to get through my thick head. Its been popping up in my mind a lot lately. Today I used it a lot at I was headed to a job interview. I just felt the need to take it all to him. I know I should've have done it sooner but I guess there's no need to cry over spilt milk.

I had the job interview today for Woodforest Bank in Brenham. I like the sound of the job. The pay is really good too. The only thing that would prevent me from getting the job is my credit history. This is my penance I guess for all my partying. I could've been doing something more worthwhile with my time or money. Instead I felt the need to party, drink, and try a few drugs. Just take everything to the Lord in prayer. I've done this. Now I'm not sure what I'm supposed to feel. Am I supposed to feel lightened of my load. I guess it doesn't do any good to worry about it. Its nothing I can help right. Its all in the Lords hands. If I'm supposed to have the job the Lord will provide.

My car kept acting up on me today. I sure was praying and trying to worship the Lord then. Why is it you want to glory Him when you're in need but not when you are being blessed, and recieving his gifts. Thats another lesson I need to learn. Its all in him. Maybe by showing my feelings in my blog it'll become easier. I'll know that people read it and maybe I'll be held accountable for my beliefs. This is a long hard road, but in the end the prize is worth it.

Lord please help me to overcome the worldy temptations that surround me everyday. Show me that you are worth living for. My life is for you. My body is made to serve you. On my knees worshipping you is where I need to be. Watch over my friends and I. Help Will and I know what we need to do. I love him so much and I want our love to blossom in your eyes. Help us to overcome the temptations of the flesh. Everything you do is glorious. I know one day I will be able to enter your Kingdom and it will be because of your sacrafice. Show me the way Lord. All things are possible through you. Amen...

This is Wills buddy Jason getting a lap dance at The Roadhouse in Hockley. He had a couple of weeks of leave from the Navy so he came home and we tried to show him a great time. Thanks to Eric of Blackdog Productions for doing this for us. He had such a wonderful time here he didn't want to go back. He was a very fun and interesting guy. And very cute...

Job Interview

Woodforest Bank called me for a job interview. They are opening a new branch in Brenham and want to interview me for a positition. So I go in at 10:30 Tuesday morning. Awesome!!!

Chicken Noodle Soup

Yummy Will and I went over a friends house last night and they made us homemade chicken noodle soup and a chocolate cake. It was soooo yummy. Then we visited and watched a movie. When Wills buddy Jason came home we got to hang out with some different people. Shawn went to school with Will and Jason and Stephanie's older sister Mary Beth went to school with me. Well now Will and I have a new couple to hang out with. We're having them over for dinner tonight. Its fun.

So anyways Will and I both have suck ass jobs. He goes into Houston everyday and just sits around till a job comes up. He didn't work one day last week. I worked a total of 8 hours. Next week I'm scheduled for 9. That totally blows. I have to find another job.

I had a lot of fun getting to know Jason. He was soooo cute. Tall dark and handsome. I don't think any of us will be forgetting Jasons trip home for a while. What a great night we all had. Well actually it stretched into two days. Awesome. It was great we took him out to karaoke at the Roadhouse in Hockley. We got Eric to get him a lap dance. He had like 5 girls all over him. It was great. Alright well I'll write more laters...

Not A Very Good Job

Ok so at first I was very excited when I was offered the job at Cold Stone Creamery. It sounded very enticing. I could sing and act like an idiot. But now that I have been there 3 days I see a couple of problems. First of all I was told it would be a full time job. This week I am scheduled for 12 hours and next week 9 hours. That isn't even part time. The next thing is is that I am working with a bunch of high school students and they all don't give a crap. This 17 year old today was like I hate kids, cause we had some "kids" walk in the store. They were the exact same age as her if not older. They certainly weren't younger. None of these people want to be there. I am the oldest person that works there besides the owners and heck they aren't even there most of the time.

Tonight the Fire Ants are playing in College Station at Fitzwillys. It is there 8th or 9th year at Fitzwilly's. That and they haven't played together in over a year. I haven't seen them in sooo long. I was hoping Will might be awake when I got home and we could go for the last hour. But no he is passed out. Oh well I really didn't have the money to go anyways. I would have loved it though. I could have sung with them one last time. Hmm when I get married I really want them to play the wedding. They really are good friends. I wonder how much they charge for a wedding.

Right now I am listening to 89.3 KSBJ on the web. I'm trying to change little things in my life. I know there are lots of ways I am still sinning. Its really hard to change things. I mean I know I shouldn't have sex but its just once you're in that groove you just don't want to quit. Cussing is hard too. I do it a lot. I need to stop. I know there are many more sins that I commit on a daily basis but what they are I'm not quite sure. Oh well one step at a time. Right? As long as I am trying to change thats good right. I spent way too much time in life chasing after things that I shouldn't have. I wish I would have realized I had a savior a long time ago. I guess is just takes some people time to do it.

Well I guess thats it for tonight. I pray everyone is doing great and in good health. Marcie should be going into labor anytime in the next week or so. I can't wait to see the baby. Later days...

I'm gonna be one of Anna's BRIDESMAIDS

Yaaay I was so hoping she'd ask me. Daniel and Anna are so dear to me. This is the coolest thing ever. Its too cool when both the bride and groom are especially good friends of yours. This is toooo awesome. I am so excited. They are gonna be so adorable. I can't wait to see bridesmaid dresses and stuff. I love you guys sooo much. This is just incredible. Well more laters.

Oh yeah I finally have the internet back so I can resume blogging at normal intervals. Instead of months in between. This is fricking wonderful.

Oh another thing on June 10, I accepted Christ into my life. I know it was the right choice. Now I really have to start trying to do the right things. In life it is so easy to do the wrong ones. All you out there please pray for me and help me to be a better person on the Lords eyes.